October 7, 2014

The Pink Veneer


Save the ta-tas! Hooray for the hooters! Do you have breast cancer? Congratulations, it appears you’ve joined the it crowd. Step right up and claim your seat at the cool kids table. An invitation to a variety of splendid social events is now yours.

The reality of a breast cancer diagnosis is not adorable, exciting, or pink. It’s dark, lonely, and miserable. The sudden realization that you are vulnerable comes as a shock. Cancer is ugly. It beats you down, even if you focus on staying positive. Fatigue rules the day. Surgery is difficult – scars remain. Chemo is in a toxic class of its own. Unpleasant side effects manifest – some linger. Radiation is a daily burn.

It’s a scheduling nightmare to juggle doctors’ appointments, treatment times, and babysitters’ availability, without dropping the ball. It means working on days you feel like quitting. When you hit a wall, it requires placing your pride on the back burner in order to reach out and plead for a little help. It’s trying to put on a happy face, so the kids don’t get scared.

The entire experience is an all-consuming emotional drain. It’s even hard to hear well-meaning people exclaim that they are glad you are “all done with that,” as damage to your body and psyche lingers.     

Happy to be alive? Without question. Ever be the same? Never. Are you ready to tie on your pink ribbon and head back to the party?

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