I feel like a car that has been parked in the garage. I haven't been out much since my surgery. I've been to the doctor and to church this past Sunday. I dusted off the cobwebs and took a walk around the neighborhood because the weather was so nice yesterday. I pushed Jayce in the stroller while Kaylee lapped me on her scooter. Everything I have read tells me that exercise helps with everything, but after 30 minutes of pushing that stroller up my hilly streets I wasn't sure what it was helping!
I'm happy that my surgical pathology report was such a good one, but I wish the surgical site would hurt less. I don't want to be a wimp about it, but I thought it would feel better than this by now. It has improved, I try to remind myself. While I cope with the end of step one, my mind wanders to next step.
I'm back in a holding pattern, not knowing what to expect once again. Next week, I have appointments with the medical oncologist and the radiation oncologist. I guess I will find out more about the plan at that point or I may face more tests first. I just don't know, but I do know that I don't feel ready to take on the unknown of chemo. I think I'll just stay in the garage a little longer, it really isn't that bad in here.
It is very daunting going through all these new experiences. It's true you feel like you are caught in limbo. the fear of the unknown wondering how you will feel. Keep ginger tea on hand for those days you may feel sick with Chemo. Don't push yourself, you may need help during this time. Chemo affects everyone differently. I opted not to have radiation You may feel losing your hair is the worst thing. If you can maintain a sense of humour it won't be so bad. I did shave mine till I looked like Benjamin Button with wispy strands no longer a full head of long blonde hair.... Take care of yourself.. rest as much as possible. It's ok to come out of the garage...
ReplyDeleteLove Alli x
Thanks Alli, it is always good to hear from people who have been through it. I came out of the garage today! I put in some hours at work for the first time since surgery! We'll see what I can do about keeping life "normal" until the next phase arrives!
DeleteJennifer
I know what you mean about not knowing what to expect. I had my mastectomy (left side-nipple saving) on the 9th of July at Huntsman Cancer Center in SLC. They've had my odd pathology report (cancer cells in 4 ducts, micro cancer cells in nodes 1&2, and 2 microscopic clusters near the lower inside margin) since the 16th of July, it didn't go before the doctors till the 2nd of August and I'll finally have a consultation with a radiation oncologist for possible radiation treatment on the 22nd. I'm trying not to stress over whether or not I'll be having radiation, and just live my life.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand I've had my first fill of my expander (which feels really odd) last week, and mowed my lawn for the first time yesterday! I'm 50, busy and I ain't got time for cancer! :D
I'll pray that everything goes well for you at your appointments and that the PET scan won't find anything odd. <3
Best wishes, Meg
Way to go! Mowing your lawn and living your life...we ain't got time for cancer, that's right! Best wishes to you Meg and good luck on your 'unknowns' right now. I'm finding out there are so many things that "feel weird" in this process! When I picked up my 12 month old the first few times after the surgery (I used the "good side" which is the side with the chest port however) I had an odd, somewhat painful feeling that port was going to just pop right out of my chest! ICK!
DeleteJennifer